A busy weekend

We had a weekend of running yet nothing really got accomplished. That would be the story of my life these days. Saturday we sat in our PJ's most of the day and then went out for supper. We haven't done that in a while. On Sunday we decided to go and get D's 5 yr. pictures taken. He was so excited. He has grown so much at our house. The first time we did pictures with him I was exhausted after 10 minutes and 1 picture worth keeping. We did good this time we got 5 keeper pictures in 26 minutes and we had to wait 2 hours just to get our pictures taken. I am proud of him and love watching him grow. I will post a pic once they get me my CD that they forgot to give me last night. Now I start my typical week of running and running and running.

Cleaning

Why is it, that I feel I need to clean everytime a caseworker is coming out to my house? I know some of it comes from my mom who use to clean for days before company came even if the house was already clean. Some of it I think though is my insecurities. I have never felt like I could do anything good enough and this is just another place it shows. Oh well it is just life and my house could always use a good cleaning.

1 Year

One year ago our little angel boy became ours officially. He had been placed in our home for foster care at 4 days old, but just 11 days shy of being 6 months old he became ours. I still shiver when I think about it. Last year we carried him in to the court house to become first time parents. Now he would be walking into the courthouse babbling to the judge. I can't believe how much he has grown in this one year. A year that I will never forget. I just wanted to share the info. Thanks for reading.

Shes leaving

Well the day and time have finally came for our fd to leave our nest. She was suppose to be a short term placement of a week. Well that was 6 or 7 weeks ago. We are going to miss her greatly. She has been the best little girl, considering what she has been through. We know she is leaving tomorrow. The time on the other hand is up for grabs. The caseworker says one thing, mom says another and I am just the foster parent who knows nothing. Well maybe not, but that is sure how I feel right now.

She was our first full time foster child and she has taught us a lot. It is so amazing to see what a 3 yr. old can teach a 30 something year old couple. We have also learned many things. I have found out African American hair is not as scary as I thought it was. In fact if I must say so myself I think I have become pretty good at doing it. There skin though I am still struggling with, but she isn't going home any worse off than what she came with for dry skin.

So tomorrow night is going to be different in our house. Only an infant no 3 yr. old any more. I knew when she came she was only short term, but she still managed to wrap my heart all around her. So after she leaves she will be greatly missed. I think Chris, my husband, is going to miss her too. When I told him she was leaving last night he said we had to go and get her a going home present. So he found a sleepy Dora dolly for her . I found this funny because we normally don't spend a lot on presents and Dora was over $20 and he said she needed her. I just smiled because in my heart I knew he was going to miss her too.

So I am writing this post with tears in my eyes and prayers in my heart, for a little girl who became the world to us while she was here.

Definitely

I never thought that the word definitely would mean so much to me. For the last three weeks we have been waiting to hear if our miracle baby boy would be staying with us permanently. We are still awaiting that answer, but last night we received a email from his GAL stating that just because there was a family interested that had a 14 yr. old half brother it didn't definitely mean they would automatically get him. I still know this isn't saying that he is ours, but it atleast makes me feel like we have a chance. We pray daily that God lets this little miracle stay. I love him as if he is my own. So we still wait, but we wait with faith and hope that he will be our forever son.

Awaiting Answers

Well I started to read Kari's blog a few weeks ago when we found out that we may be about to adopt our little miracle baby boy through the foster care system. And since than my life has been on a roller coaster of emotions. So I thought maybe writing and sharing would easy some of the fear and sadness I have coursing through me right now.

For those of you who don't know me. My name is Tina and my husband and I are new foster parents. We went into this knowing we may only be able to share our love for a short time, but hoping to be able to adopt through the foster care system. We had only had one placement since we were licensed when we got the call there was a infant needing a home and this would be a good chance for adoption. We were so happy. We found out later he may not stay with us and it has broke our hearts. We still pray every night and may times through out the day that he will be our forever son and we will be his forever parents. We hope for the best, but am preparing ourselves for the worst.

We also have a 3 yr. old foster daughter with us. We took her in thinking it would only be a week or so that she was her and her case has ended up in limbo. So we spend days just awaiting answers.

I love both of these children and I know that we have showed them every single bit of love that we have in us and I know my heart will break when they leave, but I will atleast know they were loved while them were here.

So my husband and I have started this wonderful journey. And our first placement brought many surprises to our house. The first and most important being the amount of love you can show a child even when you know they may only be with you for a short time. The others, well weren't so nice....She brought a pretty nasty cold this way and a lovely outbreak of ringworm. So if this post doesn't make any sense I do apologize. I am sleep deprived with a 1 month old, on cold medicine, and treating myself for a pretty nasty case of ringworm. But I wouldn't change any of it.